and some insomnia

blarg I hate not being able to sleep. so here I am, pretending to be cool.

see how cool I am? I wrote this in october 2003. at the time I called it “experiences: a thought meander.” I do miss writing…

Have you ever been in a friendship that you knew was coming to an end? You can feel things winding down, drifting apart, slowly dying. Did you try to fight it? ignore it? or just make the most out of those last days?

To me, autumn always feels like a fading friendship. There’s a wistful enjoyment in watching the leaves change color. Their beauty is made all the more exquisite knowing that they’ll soon be fallen, leaving the trees bare. Maybe that awareness of the limited time frame is what makes autumn more appreciated. Maybe this season is a metaphor for life, and the reason we can find so much fulfillment is because we try to make the most out of those “last days.”

Imagine if this life went on indefinitely. Would each new morning matter? The first snowfall of the year could hardly fill you with excitement. There would be a hundred more to come, a thousand more already past. The fact that we can only experience a finite number of snowfalls makes each of them a glorious wonder.

There are so many things we pay little attention to because we see them so often, yet they, too, are limited. How many times have you seen the moon come up over the mountains? How many of those times did you stop for a moment, captivated by its breathtaking grandeur? What about storm clouds in the distance, stretching down to earth with their mists of rain? I love the colors of a summer sunset, the sky glowing with lavenders and golds you have to experience to believe. That’s what life is about—experiences. Get yours while you can, before the last leaf of autumn falls.

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One thought on “and some insomnia

  1. 'sposita says:

    part of enjoying eternity will have to come in living in the “now” – because even if there are an infinite amount of days, each one is unique in its own glory, depravity, and beauty.

    the Dude is a good pointer-outer of things that i often take for granted. such is the joy of childhood – every experience is new. and perhaps that’s part of what is meant by
    the commandment to be as little children

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